Balanced Motherhood? Is there even such a thing?

I watched "She said, She said", the latest of Sun Life's latest Sun Shorts. I related to both. Boy, did I relate to it. #Hugot!

Who can't relate being a daughter to a hardworking parent? My mom was and oh! What big shoes I have to fill. I was so much like Calista, there may be moments we came head to head but I knew she was my queen, she used to be everything to me! Now, I am a mom like that in the film, hoping someday that my best was enough so Claud could see me like I saw my mom....

I consider it life’s blessings when I got an invite to Sun Life’s Mom’s Day Out, I was feeling defeated that day. When you become a mom, nothing is ever sure. Nothing feels secure. Everyday is always different. You give everything you have and then some. When you fail, you get broken, leaving you to wonder if at the end of it all, do you still have enough pieces left?

No truer words have ever been spoken when my mom told me, "You'll understand me when you have a child of your own." Tears would just roll down my face because of the veracity of what she said. I am living her life now and can only do half of the things that she did. Which made me realize what a great mother I had.

Then I listened, Michelle, as always with her talks make me feel like she was talking to me personally. She was echoing words and situations that I went through myself. She was talking about the struggle of every mother trying to balance everything like a juggler with may two many balls in the air but only with two hands. As a mother, it's one of the scariest things that we do everyday because it is the only way we know how. We are ridden with guilt every time we think we do not give our all. Can we do it differently? Is there other way to deal with all of these?

I am that juggler, and I see some of the things I love that I juggle on the verge of falling, of breaking. There's myself, there's my career, my household and sometimes, I think even my marriage.

She said, "accept the changes, the challenges, the changes and challenges of having children." Take this as an opportunity to grow and not to fight against it. It was such are relief to know that I didn't have to know everything, that I only had to look to myself and see that I am capable. She said that life is about learning and embracing the imbalance of life. And what a great day to say, “Pagod na ko! Time Out!”

That by accepting it, calm would follow to able to face it head on. To always be positive, to feel alive and be in the moment. To indulge in letting go and have self-care moment. But as moms, can we truly really feel relaxed?

Yes! We can!

At the end of her talk, I felt blessed. I didn't see that when I felt I was drowning, someone was there for me. My husband who allows me to stay in bed til 10 in the morning. He is the one who works so hard that he was able to acquire Sun Life Insurance for the family. The one who never forgets to kiss me goodbye and goodnight, who gives me so much great reasons to smile everyday and one who tells me what a great mother I am to our child. And then there is our Yaya Jezel, who is the best yaya you could ever hope for. Not because she is skilled (though she is) but because she has so much love for our child that when we are not with Claud, we feel at peace knowing Jezel is with her. And then there is our family and friends who are always ready to lend us a helping hand whenever we need them.

Looking at it now, I do have a balanced life and what joy it brought to me now that I see things more clearly. The internal knot slowly unraveling... It's my responsibility to live a balanced life and to take care of myself first and foremost. There’s should be no shame it that.

But I needed to take in this moment as an opportnity to grow. Listening to Mylene Segismundo enlightened my mind in seeing the future of our daughter. I grew up in a family that sees having best quality education is important. My mother worked hard so I can get a good educationl she could afford and so did my husband with his parents. That is why we will do the same for Claud.

We enrolled her to pre-school this year and we are daunted with the high price tuition fees of the best pre-schools in the country. My husband and I decided that getting an educational plan will be our top priority now that Claud began schooling. W have started shopping for companies who would meet our requirements, our budget of course. Since we are quite adept in numbers and legalities of insurance, it wasn't a surprise to know that Claud's college matriculation could amount to 2 million pesos by the time she enrolls. Yes, that's inflation for you in the next 14 years.

Though our faith is secured and we believe that God will always provide us with everything we need, having a little bit of insurance I feel only utilizes what God has given us. To start as early as we can and finish as soon as we can so we don’t have to worry about it. It’s getting ahead of something so that we don’t have to make it a problem in the future.

Sun Life’s My Future Fund series is a locked in period or a target-dated fund with different timings (2025, 2033 etc.). With 14 years in our belt to do this, there’s a flexibility of pulling out the fund at a certain time (say, 2033) but it allows for discipline for us to make money for matriculation or take it for any kind of use. I would have to set a meeting with our Sun Life Advisor for this so we may fully understand it. We after all want to be fully engaged in every financial decision our family makes.

This is a great exercise of being mindful as a mom because you are minding things that you would be in need of in the future that you can actually have control in the present!! How awesome is that? We can never be sure of the future and that’s where insurance comes in. Insurances allow us to control our future needs in the present.

I enjoyed the Mom’s Day Out. I may love a day at the spa especially Onsen Spa at I’M Hotel but as much as my body was relaxed with every soothing massage and my tummy filled with sumptuous food from the buffet, there is nothing like the mind being filled with great learnings and realizations. Allowing us to be truly at rest and to be at peace. Massage can only go as skin deep, food as much as we can digest… but wisdom and faith goes a loooong way in giving you that truly relaxed state, worries leaving your mind.

That finally, I can say that I am in road of being the best wife and mother my family needs. And who care what happens in the future? I do! I'm glad my insurance can take care of that so I can afford to live in the moment.

With fellow mombloggers, Rowena, Frances and Ginger. We did not only share the food on the spread but also experiences of being a mother and ways to deal with all the chaos.

Looking things at a brighter perspective.

This room weas empty at first but we all came out with our hearts overflowing. Thank you Michelle for reassuring us that we are doing our best and Mylene for the wonderful tips of financial planning, specifically educational planning.